Birthday Special

The night before my last birthday there were three cards on the table for me in their envelopes.  Arionna came downstairs and examined the envelopes.  After flipping one over which had my "To:Chance", she complained, "Mom, you didn't specialize his card!"

Marie replied, "It has his name on it."

Grabbing a pencil Arionna asked, "How is he supposed to know who it is from?"  After a moment of scribbling she uttered the following phrase, "Oops, this isn't from Alora...".

Her Birthday

Almost a decade ago, for Christmas, I spent hours at home working late at night creating a calendar in HTML.  I used it to embed pictures of the family members, record birthdays, anniversaries and many other events.  Every month featured pictures of the family at the top.  It took hours.  I kept this secret from everyone, printing them at night, hiding the calendar pages at my work, and assembling them during my lunch hour.  I started months before hand and they were a great success.

Ever since then my wife has made the calendars.  Well, the next year on April 23th my wife turned to me, pointed to the calendar which had her birthday clearly marked and said, "You never wished me a Happy Birthday!"

I put my arms around my wife and whispered in her ear, "Love, April 23rd is the day I graduated from Riddle, your birthday is on the 26th."

"Oops," she replied.

So, be it the 23rd or the 26th (its the 26th), I want to wish my wife a wonderful Happy Birthday.

Adult in the Family

Marie, Arionna and I were in the kitchen.

"Mom," Arionna said, "can you make me a taco?"

"No, I've got to go pick up cookies in a few minutes from the girl scout booth.  Besides, I'm not the only adult in the room.  There is one standing right next to me?"

Arionna looks around.  I wait for her to ask me to make her a taco as she disappears around the corner of the kitchen.  Moments later she comes back with my mother-in-law in tow.

Yep, not only am I expendable, I'm no longer considered an Adult!

P.A.C.

Marie works as a teacher at a private school, so things are a bit different than in the public school.  The following exchange took place in our kitchen.

"Tomorrow we have the PAC meeting, so I'll be a little late for dinner,"  Marie said.

"What is the PAC," Arionna asked.

"It's like the Parent Teacher Association at Aspen Creek," Marie replied.

"No, what does it mean,"  Arionna asked.  Before Marie could reply Arionna blurted out, "I got it!  Parent's Are Crazy!"

All Full

Marie runs various events as part of Macaroni Kid Broomfield/Arvada/Westminster.  One of them was a "Baby Brunch".  Arionna (9) was in the kitchen with Marie and the following exchange took place:

Arionna: "Will your pregnant friend make it to the Baby Brunch?"
Marie: "No, I'm all full."
Arionna: "But I don't want you to be a awful...get it...All full--awful."

The pun force is strong in this one.